Dear Freshman Ethan,

There are so many things I want to tell you—specific things I would want you to change, interactions, classes you took, etc. I could tell you the outcomes of your high school experiences: the friends you meet, the hobbies and passions that will consume your being, the college you will attend, and more. But in doing those things, I think I would ruin the discoveries that will define your high school experience. So instead, I will leave you with a few broader words of wisdom that may help guide you through this time of self-exploration. 

If you want to achieve something, do it. I know you want to write more, start playing guitar, and take certain classes, but I also know that you are stopping yourself from actually doing these things. You fear failure: fear the fact that what you do won’t be as good as you think the first time around, fear that others are much better than you. But you need to at least try. Trying will unlock the potential to get better in the long run. And after you try for a while, you just might be able to find the success you desire. 

These four years will be made up of a series of leaps of faith. You will need to be able to find both the stride and the courage to jump. 

I know you feel as if you have courage, but trust me, what you currently have is arrogance—something you must work to lose during this time. I know it’s kind of baked into who we are, as a coping mechanism for our insecurities, but that does not mean it cannot be tamed. Your self-perception is not only the obstacle that will hinder your progression as a person, but it will also act as a barrier from appreciating the time you have during high school. 

Your sense of self is nothing but an amorphous wax that takes the form of the world around it. Understand this; it will allow you to learn the truth of both yourself and your interaction with your surroundings. 

Oh yeah, we are still really pretentious. I am sorry about that. 

Talking to you brings back many memories. In some ways I loathe you for the person you were and also love you because of how far you’ve come. I can never hate you because I know you will come to yourself with time. I hope these words help you do that. 

—Ethan