Before Maddie Comstock (12) knew anything else about herself, she knew that she was a writer. As her younger brother and the other kids in the neighborhood opted to play outside, 5-year-old Comstock spent her afternoons typing up stories in Comic Sans font at her dad’s desktop monitor about characters she imagined, the magical monsters they were fighting, and the faraway fictional lands they occupied.
“For as long as I can remember, writing has always been something that’s made me very happy,” Comstock said. “When I was younger, it was mostly writing fiction and whenever we had assignments in class where we could do whatever we wanted, I’d always choose to write a story.”
Entranced by fiction throughout elementary and middle school, Comstock knew that she wanted to pursue writing more seriously in high school.
“I’ve always taken the most advanced English classes offered in every year of high school because English has always been really important to me,” Comstock said. “It just seemed like the natural choice because writing was ‘my thing,’ or just a skill that I felt was really personal or special to me. When I was approached by [English teacher Jeff] Wenger about [joining The Nexus], I felt like it was the right choice.”
In her sophomore year, Comstock enrolled in Journalism II and became a staff writer for The Nexus.
For Jane Kennedy (11), her “thing” was dance. Starting ballet, hip-hop, and contemporary dance classes at just 3 years old, the dance studio was like her second home, the dancers were like a second family, and the sport was a part of her identity.
“Because I started dancing at such a young age, it became a big part of my life very quickly,” Kennedy said. “At first, I started dancing because my parents wanted me to be active. Because I spent so much time in the studio, taking classes and being around the other girls, though, it became something bigger than that.”
Outside of the dance studio, dance played a key role in Kennedy’s life as well. When she was assigned research projects in history class, she always chose to research the American Ballet Company’s principal dancer Misty Copeland, and when she met other girls, the first fact that Kennedy would share about herself was that she was a dancer.
“It sounds silly to say it now, but dancing was ‘my thing’ or that trait I always shared about myself to other people when I was getting to know them,” Kennedy said. “It made sense to do that because it was such a big part of my time and my life at that point that people associated that with me.”
Shianne Mikell is a therapist for Passion to Purpose Consulting and graduated from the University of Albany with a master’s degree in social work. Having specialized in studying adolescent-to-adult transitions, Mikell said it’s common for young people to find activities they become attached to.
“Students may engage in a hobby or sport to serve as an outlet for emotional expression,” Mikell said. “Hobbies and passions can contribute significantly to a student’s identity and development because of the amount of time they spend on it or because adolescents like to find groups or communities they can identify with.”
For both Comstock and Kennedy, their experiences in the newspaper and in dance respectively became large parts of how they perceived themselves and how they wanted to be perceived by others.
“After I joined, saying I was a part of The Nexus became a big part of how I introduced myself to people,” Comstock said. “It was easy because people on campus knew what it was and it was cool to be able to say that writing was ‘my thing’ and I was in a group of lots of people who also felt that way.”
For Kennedy, introducing herself as a dancer also acted as an icebreaker when meeting new people and making friends.
“In elementary and middle school, so many girls were dancers so it was an easy thing to bond over and become friends with someone else because of,” Kennedy said. “For a point, it felt like I was always talking about dance whether I was at the studio or whether I was at school.”
According to Mikell, a strong connection between an adolescent and one specific passion can be attributed to the fact that many young people are often trying to build a sense of community and identity. However, if the commitment exists only for a singular passion, it can hold a person back from discovering other potential interests.
“At first, having one passion can make sense because of the time investment or emotional investment a student may have in it,” Mikell said. “However, it’s significant for students to try out different hobbies as it allows them to try various things that best resonate with the person they’d like to become.”
For Comstock, The Nexus’ community of upperclassmen made her first year in the class a positive experience.
“It was really great because I had a lot of people to turn to for guidance about writing, and also a lot of people who were able to help me through things I was going through in my life because they were older than me,” Comstock said. “I got to be very connected to some of the seniors on staff and that became a big part of my attachment to The Nexus.”
As for Kennedy, who grew up alongside the other dancers in her studio, each passing year would bring about graduating members or dancers who quit the sport. With these changes in the community, Kennedy’s relationship with the studio would fluctuate, which she said led her to wonder if she was committed to the sport or if she was connected to the comfort of knowing the other dancers for a long time. At the height of the COVID-19 pandemic, Kennedy felt like she found her answer.
“We were doing classes on Zoom, which just wasn’t the same because the sense of community was really gone,” Kennedy said. “I lost a lot of passion for dance when I wasn’t going to classes at the studio or seeing the people I danced with and grew up with all the time. I was also getting into high school, so I knew I had to think about what I was putting my time towards and I felt like dancing wasn’t a priority for me anymore.”
In Comstock’s junior year on The Nexus, after the senior staff members she felt most bonded with graduated, she felt less connected to the staff than she had been.
Coupled with the fact that Comstock was now experimenting with trying new extracurricular activities — running for track and field and starting set design with Westview’s theater company — the amount of time she spent in the Nexus room dwindled.
“It felt like a big transitional point because I used to spend all my time on Nexus, but I wanted to branch out from that,” Comstock said, “It used to be that some of my closest friends were in Nexus, but since they graduated, I was now closest with people in theater who wanted me to join them there. They knew I always liked art so they encouraged me to apply to be in theater tech and I did.”
Beginning theater tech in the winter of her junior year, Comstock said she realized she’d found a new passion.
“I didn’t expect it to, but theater tech became something that meant so much to me and I was constantly thinking about it,” Comstock said. “After track and field practices, I would go to set and build without even changing out of my running shorts and after press nights [for The Nexus], I would stay behind to go to set, even if I could only be there for half an hour. In other classes, I was always looking forward to what to do at set and whenever I had a choice to, I’d always choose to be at tech.”
According to Mikell, when individuals discover new passions when they’ve already made other extracurricular commitments, they can often feel as though they can’t pursue their new interest.
“Individuals may avoid starting a new hobby because of familiarity and comfort within the hobby they’ve invested a significant amount of time, effort and resources into,” Mikell said. “The most common factor is also the social expectations and external pressure of their support system, as most individuals are worried about how others may perceive them after losing interest in a hobby.”
Despite knowing she wanted to take theater tech more seriously, Comstock felt tethered to The Nexus. She didn’t want to let a staff full of her friends down, and she didn’t want to tell a teacher she admired that she was losing passion for their shared interest.
“[The Nexus] became like a second priority for me and that made me feel really bad because I always felt like I was letting people down when I didn’t turn my stuff in or time or I when I didn’t prioritize the newspaper when it was so important to everyone else,” Comstock said. “I also didn’t want to let Mr. Wenger down because he was a big part of my writing career and he helped me a lot in getting to where I’m at today.”
When course request forms were rolled out in the spring before Comstock’s senior year, she was faced with an ultimatum: The Nexus and the theater tech class she wanted to take both took place during 4th period. By this point, Comstock knew she couldn’t keep pursuing both and she had to make a decision.
“It was so hard because there was no in-between choice — I had to fully commit to one or the other,” Comstock. “At first, I was going to stay in Nexus, but over the summer when I went to the CTE (Career & Technical Education) camp at Westview and attended the theater tech class, I had this moment where I realized how much I love art and building and that I needed to take Westview’s theater tech class.”
When Kennedy was finally coming to the decision to quit dancing the summer before her freshman year of high school, she said it was a bittersweet but also freeing moment.
“It was sad because I had to tell my teachers that I’d known for so long that I wouldn’t be dancing anymore and there were certain people at the studio too who I was saying goodbye to because I knew I wouldn’t be spending time with them the same way I used to,” Kennedy said. “But it was also freeing because I felt like I could try new things or join new clubs as a freshman and dance wouldn’t hold me back from doing that.”
In coming to the decision to let go, Mikell said it’s important that individuals have time to process their decision.
“After letting go, it can be helpful for students to self-reflect, setting clear goals for what they want to do next, and focus on fostering positive relationships with others,” Mikell said. “It is essential that the student acknowledge their feelings, grieve if necessary, and begin to find new activities or interests that support their lifestyle.”
At the start of her freshman year, Kennedy was able to discover on her own terms what she wanted to try out. Kennedy knew that she wanted to stay active and she wanted to participate in a no-contact sport like dance. When she joined track and field in the spring, she instantly fell in love.
“Throughout my freshman season of track, I really felt that I loved it and I wanted to continue,” Kennedy said. “From there, it all made sense because I always loved running in elementary school and I was big on racing in our little Olympic games, and running was always something I was competitive about.”
Kennedy’s dad also ran track and field in the hurdles event, and Kennedy said that her new interest in the sport has been something for them to bond over.
“I definitely learned a lot of new stories about him and he also gives me tips and different techniques to try,” Kennedy said. “This only happened because I finally quit dancing and found something new, so I’m grateful that I was able to find something that I cared as much and even more about.”
Starting her senior year, Comstock finally began taking the theater tech class she’d been waiting so long to be a part of.
“I get to be in the shop all the time during 4th period and after now, which has really helped me with being able to do more work or take on bigger leadership roles,” Comstock said. “It felt like a weight off my shoulder had been lifted because I could fully commit to designing sets or being in the tech room, and I feel like I’ve been enjoying myself more.”
In the spring show “Mean Girls,” Comstock acted as head set designer. Additionally, she will major in Technical Theater at San Diego State University in the fall so she can continue to grow her love for the art of set design.
In spite of finding her new passion in theater tech, Comstock said she still has a love for writing — she’s still taking AP English Literature, still acts as one of the presidents of the Wallflower Poetry Club, and she still reads The Nexus when it comes out every three weeks.
From letting go of making writing her singular passion, Comstock said she’s been able to explore a new side of her artistic expression that she can see herself pursuing for the rest of her life.
“I don’t even know how to explain it well, but there’s this sense of pride and investment and joy that I get from seeing something I built in set on the stage, and it makes me very excited and sure that I love what I’m doing,” Comstock said. “It’s a different feeling from anything I’ve never felt in any extracurricular or sport and I’m so grateful that all of my past passions and experiences have given me the chance to find something that’s really ‘my thing.’”
